Saturday, December 17, 2016

Grief (Part 1) ~ An Advent Reading

 
Matthew 1:18-20

18 This is how Jesus the Messiah was born. His mother, Mary, was engaged to be married to Joseph. But before the marriage took place, while she was still a virgin, she became pregnant through the power of the Holy Spirit. 19 Joseph, to whom she was engaged, was a righteous man and did not want to disgrace her publicly, so he decided to break the engagement quietly.
20 As he considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream. “Joseph, son of David,” the angel said, “do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife. For the child within her was conceived by the Holy Spirit.”

Verse 20 says he “considered” this and I’ve always read that to mean how to, as a righteous man, break their engagement respectfully. But today I’m thinking that in the midst of considering that, he must have considered so much more. Even a man can’t compartmentalize well enough to avoid the implications of why he is having to consider this in the first place! He had been betrothed to this woman and by our cultures standards they were already married with the exception of having shared a bed. So, having been so connected to every part of this woman EXCEPT for that one thing, the one thing she had apparently now given to another man, consider the amount of grief that certainly flooded his heart. All of his hopes for his upcoming marriage, the countless hours he’d spent contemplating their future together, the life they would build together that he had been dreaming of for so long were now laying tattered at his feet.

Surely he was grieving, his heart wrenching in not only his chest, but even in his gut. And now instead he had to contemplate this, this THING. This AWFUL thing that single handedly shattered all of it. I’m sure he was flabbergasted and even wondered, “How could she do this? I would have never suspected her of such a thing. I never even saw this coming. Now what will I do? Shame her? No, that only shames me, too. I am connected to her already through our covenant to marry. What will my future now hold? I never wanted to have to start all over again.” And then, in the midst of his grief, a messenger from the Lord with a message, “do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife. For the child within her was conceived by the Holy Spirit.”

“Do not be afraid… ” what a strange response to his grief. Is fear really a part of the grieving process? I think the indications are yes.

Do you have a grief in your life? Have you ever considered that at the heart of your grief there may be unresolved fear? God has sent us messenger after messenger to remind us “don’t be afraid.” Easier said than done, though, righ? We can’t just stop being afraid. If we could, we’d snap our fingers and never be here again! So how do we drive out this fear? By losing ourselves hopelessly to His perfect love. A perfect love that was born in a manager over 2000 years ago. A love that lives even now in our hearts if we only chose to offer it to Him and thus allow.

I John 4:16-18
16 We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love.
God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. 17 And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.
18 Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love.

No comments:

Post a Comment